Here’s the punch line: Some people, are not going to like you. Quite often, there is nothing you can do to change their minds. At any rate, why would you bother trying?
In a world where our value is governed by the number of little hearts we get on our selfies. A world where negative comments from some random fucker, is enough to contemplate a quick jump & a long fall. A world where image is key & your following is everything. Is it any wonder that you crave validation from everyone you make virtual or real contact with?
It’s just you and me now, so be honest. Is this you? Are you basing your own self worth on the approval of others? Do you get offended by abusive or negative comments, even if they have no real worth? Do you change who you are or what you believe, in order to please someone who doesn’t like who you truly are? Have you stayed in a relationship WAY TO LONG, because you are scared to be alone?
Why? Does it not make you feel sad to fake who you are? Aren’t you sick of trying to impress everyone but yourself? If ‘Yes',’ is your answer to most/all of these questions, don’t you think it’s time for a change?
Who Am I?
I guess the first question that comes to mind is, How?
How do I just be me? Sounds a little stupid right? Asking yourself, how to be yourself. In a way it makes complete sense, before you can implement changes in your life you should know exactly who you are.
What makes you happy? What do you enjoy doing? Who do you want to spend time with? Are you a movie girl, or a documentary guy? What are your limitations & what are your strengths? What do you hate about yourself? What is important to you? Who the fuck am I!?
This might seem like a mundane and pointless task, but is it? Is learning about who you truly are & discovering the path you truly want to take in this one life of yours, pointless? I don’t think so. I think working a boring as fuck job that everyone else expects you to do is pretty pointless. I think trying to be loved by everyone in order to validate yourself is pretty pointless.
Before you can block out the hatred of others you must first understand why you hate yourself so much. In order to feel comfortable with the disapproval of others, you need to be secure with who you are. In order to love yourself, step one is to know yourself.
Some choose to find themselves through travel, others through a spiritual journey. I have had friends find themselves through plant based psychedelics, journeys that last weeks but result in a deep understanding of self. You may just want to start by looking in the mirror and asking yourself, ‘Who am I? Do I love myself?’ You might be surprised by the answer.
Our entire existence is based on stories! From caveman days to Kanye days, our lives revolve around stories. The common theme in almost every story is love. A caveman’s love for fire, Kanye’s love for his ego, God’s love for his creation or John’s love for the 10am donut run (hold on… did I just place Kanye & God on the same level?).
Love is the main theme behind all of our decisions in life, for some reason we forget to love ourselves. If you truly want to stop caring what others think of you, then you need to start loving yourself. I mean, think about it. We spend our entire lives with one person and we don’t love that person?
Yep! You are stuck with you! So, you have two options; learn to love the shit out of yourself, or spend your days hating your existence. Love yourself for all your flaws, limitations & strengths or… well… don’t. The choice is yours, so take ownership and stop complaining about everything that’s wrong with you!
Love yourself dude!
Learn to love yourself and you will never be lonely again. Learn to love yourself and you will stop hating those, who hate on you. Instead, you will understand that they are only being driven by their own insecurities. That hatred of you stems from their own personal disappointment in themselves.
Give Less Fucks
When I quit my job and traveled to NZ with the boys, pursuing my real passions, no fucks were given. When I decided to tell the world all of my weaknesses, no fucks were given. When I chose to start writing a book even after I was told about the difficulties of publishing, my shit writing style & lack of experience… yep… no fucks given.
Full disclosure, it is important to care about many things in life; yourself, your family, your true friends, your health, other people, your basic needs & the path that you have chosen to pursue. Everything else is just noice.
Who cares if you have to be a janitor in order to fund yourself while working towards your dreams, Tony Robbins did the exact same thing! Who cares if other people judge you for earning less money than they do? Why do you care that Gary from accounting talks shit about you? Why bother spending time replying to a negative comment if you believe in what you are doing? Does your career, earnings or social status really define you?
Why do you give a fuck about what people think of your choices?
Consider this; You have one life to live! Are you willing to spend that life doing what others expect of you? Are you willing to spend that life giving a fuck about the judgments of others? Or, are you going to spend your life doing what you want to do? Chasing down your purpose, falling in love with yourself, falling in love with others, showing kindness & dying with the knowledge that you lived life on your terms.
Stop Giving a Fuck about the noise, Give a Fuck about what matters to you!
People Still Hate You…
Surprise, Surprise! People still disagree with your decisions & people still hate you, welcome to life. Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi is arguably one of the kindest, happiest & most caring minds to have walked the earth… people hated him, people still do hate him.
Know yourself, love yourself & stop caring about the things that really don’t matter.
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Paulo & Jacques | Massie Bros